What is Religious Trauma?

Feeling small, dirty, or inherently broken because of what you were taught to believe about yourself in relation to God. Feeling your body is intrinsically bad. Religious songs, phrases, or locations evoking panic attacks or other symptoms in your body (nausea, headaches, stomachaches, etc.). Intrusive thoughts or pronounced anxiety regarding sin, hell, or eternal judgment. Romantic attraction or arousal inducing acute guilt or shame. Feeling you are intrinsically flawed or inferior due to aspects of yourself—gender, personality traits, orientation. Deep distrust in your own intuition, judgment, and perception. Spending hours reading the Bible or praying to lessen feelings of pronounced anxiety or guilt.

Religious beliefs and practices can provide folks with a sense of meaning, community, and purpose. However, when religion is

used—intentionally or unintentionally—as a means of power, control, or fear it can cause harm. Religious trauma refers to the emotional and psychological distress caused by harmful religious experiences. This can include spiritual abuse, rigid dogma, ostracism, or toxic environments that impact someone’s mental and physical health.

Wired for connection and belonging

As humans, we are deeply social creatures who, in the words of Brene Brown, are neurobiologically hardwired for community and belonging. “We’re hardwired to want it, and need it so much, that the first thing we do is sacrifice ourselves and who we are to achieve it.”

When we experience even the possibility of social rejection, cell receptors in our bodies perceive the fear as literally akin to physical injury. Literally on a biological level, our bodies’ register social rejection as physical harm to our bodies. We humans are literally biologically wired to avoid social rejection from our communities—religious or otherwise—at nearly any cost. Such a neural wiring may make it difficult to self-acknowledge when an environment has potentially become emotionally or psychologically harmful.

For many, religion provides a profound sense of social belonging and connection to people who share a similar way of viewing ourselves and the world. Just the act of singing in a group through church choir or worship services, floods the body with “feel good” endorphins called oxytocin, the same endorphin released in our bodies when falling in love.

Feeling a sense of life purpose and a concrete moral language for articulating and perceiving the world (sin, believer, non-believer, etc,) can also provide a sense of profound comfort and social cohesion in sharing a life purpose and view with others. In an increasingly socially isolating world that can feel uncertain or even chaotic, religion can provide a means of comfort and community.

Religious trauma, also known as Religious Trauma Syndrome (RTS), is a term used to describe the symptoms and effects of harmful religious experiences. These experiences often stem from high-control or authoritarian religious groups, spiritual abuse, or dogmatic teachings that instill fear, shame, or guilt.

Common sources of religious trauma include:

• Authoritarian environments: Faith traditions that demand unquestioning obedience or discourage critical thinking.

• Fear-based teachings: Messages centered on eternal punishment, sin, or apocalyptic “end times” beliefs that evoke anxiety or terror.

• Spiritual abuse: Unintended or intended manipulation, exploitation, or harm inflicted by religious leaders or institutions.

• Rejection or ostracism: Being shunned by religious friends, family members, or a religious community for questioning beliefs, leaving the faith, or living in ways deemed “unacceptable.”

• Internalized shame: Negative beliefs about yourself or self-loathing resulting from teachings about sin, purity, or worthiness.

Religious trauma manifests in various ways, including:

1. Emotional Symptoms:

• Guilt, shame, or fear tied to religious teachings.
• Self-loathing or resentment towards yourself due to perceptions of obedience or purity
• Difficulty experiencing joy or connection due to unresolved spiritual conflict.

2. Psychological Symptoms:

• Anxiety, depression, or PTSD-like symptoms.
• Intrusive thoughts about sin, hell, or punishment.
• Struggles with self-worth or self-identity.

3. Behavioral Symptoms:

• Avoidance or hyper-fixation regarding religious settings, symbols, or conversations.
• Difficulty setting boundaries with religious family members or communities.
• Hyper-vigilance in avoiding perceived moral failings.

4. Relational Symptoms:

• Gas lighting yourself: Not trusting your thoughts, perceptions, or feelings. Doubting your own reality.
• Feeling emotionally unsafe or fearing social rejection from family or friends who remain in the faith.

5. Spiritual Symptoms:

• Grief and loss regarding purpose and meaning
• Difficulty reconciling religious beliefs with personal values or experiences.
• Feeling you are not living with integrity: Being the same on the outside as you are on the inside.

What Is EMDR Therapy?

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is an evidence-based therapy initially developed in the 1980s for combat Vietnam veterans to treat trauma and PTSD. EMDR helps folks process distressing memories and negative beliefs about yourself to bring relief and help better create the life you want.

Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR uses bilateral stimulation (such as side-to-side eye movements, tapping, or sounds) to help the brain process unresolved trauma. The therapy follows an eight-phase protocol that includes history-taking, preparation, and reprocessing of traumatic memories.

How EMDR Can Help Folks with Religious Trauma

EMDR is particularly effective for individuals dealing with religious trauma because it addresses the roots of the distress: unresolved and painful memories, negative core beliefs, and emotions. Below are key ways EMDR can help:

1. Reprocessing Shame-Based Beliefs

EMDR helps folks revisit and reprocess potential messaging they have received that may have caused unintended harm. Through bilateral stimulation, clients can reduce the emotional intensity and presence of such pain and bring relief.

2. Healing from Spiritual Abuse

People who experience spiritual abuse frequently experience profound feelings of guilt and betrayal by trusted leaders or institutions. This may lead to feelings of powerlessness and confusion. EMDR allows folks to process the sense of betrayal while regaining a sense of anchoring and trust in yourself and in your body. By identifying the core memories associated with spiritual abuse, EMDR helps folks literally rewire neural pathways in their brains that reduce deep feelings of shame and unworthiness.

3. Addressing Shame and Guilt

Religious trauma often leaves folks carrying deep shame and guilt about their actions, identity, and even their thoughts. EMDR can target the memories that contribute to this shame, helping folks to dismantle unhealthy core beliefs such as “I am bad” or “I am unworthy.” Over time, folks can replace these beliefs with self-compassion and self-acceptance.

4. Rebuilding Self-Identity

For many, leaving a harmful religious environment means losing a sense of identity, purpose, and community. EMDR supports folks in processing this loss and identifying what they assess as their most authentically-lived path forward.

5. Reducing Triggers and Avoidance

Religious trauma can lead to avoidance behaviors, such as steering clear of churches, religious holidays, or even conversations about spirituality. EMDR helps folks identify the triggers underlying these avoidance patterns, allowing them to engage with life more fully without fear or distress.

6. Repairing Relationships

Religious trauma may strain relationships with family or friends. EMDR can address the emotional pain tied to these dynamics, enabling folks to set healthy boundaries and navigate relationships with greater confidence and clarity.

What to Expect in EMDR Therapy for Religious Trauma

Folks entering EMDR therapy with EMDR Center of Denver for religious trauma can expect a compassionate and nonjudgmental approach tailored to their unique experiences. Here is a general outline of what the process involves with us:

1. Assessment and Preparation: We will work you to identify specific memories or experiences causing distress. We review different science-backed relaxation exercises and coping strategies that can help provide relief as we prepare for EMDR.

2. Identifying Target Memories: You identify key memories or experiences that evoke strong emotional responses, such as fear of punishment or feelings of unworthiness.

3. Reprocessing: Using bilateral stimulation, you recall these memories while focusing on the emotions and beliefs they bring up. Over time, the emotional intensity lessens, and the brain begins to process the memory in a more adaptive way.

4. Integration: We help you integrate new insights into your daily life, fostering a greater sense of peace and empowerment.

Additional Strategies for Finding Relief from Religious Trauma

While EMDR is a powerful tool, healing from religious trauma often involves a holistic approach that incorporates other strategies, including:

1. Critical Self-Reflection:

Engage in introspection to identify and challenge ingrained beliefs that may have caused harm. These ingrained beliefs often become automatic, influencing decisions and behavior in ways that may no longer be healthy or life-giving.

2. Connect with Supportive Communities:

Find like-minded folks who have undergone similar journeys. Online forums, local meet-ups, or support groups can offer a sense of community and understanding, fostering a supportive environment for finding relief and establishing additional community.

3. Reconstruct Personal Beliefs:

Reevaluate and reconstruct personal beliefs that better align with who you want to be. This involves developing and/or identifying a spiritual or philosophical framework that promotes steps towards living with full integrity: being and living on the outside in full congruence with who you are on the inside without hiding or minimizing parts of yourself.

4. Educate Yourself:

Deepen your understanding of various belief systems, philosophies, and cultural perspectives. Exposure to different ideas can facilitate a broader perspective, allowing folks to form a way of seeing the world that better vibes with who you want to be and what you value.

5. Mindfulness and Self-Care:

Prioritize self-care practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and body movement (hiking, weight lifting, etc). Cultivating a healthy relationship with yourself is crucial in the process of healing from religious trauma.

6. Set Boundaries:

Set clear boundaries with folks or environments that perpetuate harm. This may involve initially (or permanently) limiting contact with toxic influences to create space for personal growth and healing.

7. Celebrate Personal Growth:

Acknowledge and celebrate milestones in this journey. Recognizing progress, no matter how small, reinforces positive changes and growth.

8. Open Dialogue with Loved Ones:

Engage in open and honest conversations with supportive friends or family members with whom you feel emotionally safe. Share your current processing of beliefs and feelings, fostering understanding and potentially strengthening relationships.

9. Patience and Compassion:

Understand that the journey of healing from religious trauma is ongoing. Approach yourself with patience and self-compassion, recognizing that personal growth is a continuous and evolving process.

Final Thoughts

Religious trauma is a deeply personal and often misunderstood form of harm that can impact every aspect of a person’s life. For those struggling with its effects, EMDR Center of Denver offers a path to relief by addressing the root causes of pain and fostering a sense of self-worth.

Healing from religious trauma takes time and courage, but with the right support and tools, it is possible to reclaim one’s identity, find relief, and create a life that more fully aligns with a sense of fulfillment and joy. EMDR, combined with other strategies, can empower folks to move forward with clarity, confidence, and hope. Interested in exploring ways that we can provide support? Schedule a free 15 consultation now.

Blog Sources:

1. EMDR International Association. (n.d.). Treating Religious and Spiritual Trauma with EMDR Therapy. Retrieved from EMDRIA

• Overview of how EMDR addresses the psychological aftermath of spiritual and religious abuse.

2. Adverse religious experiences questionnaire. Retrieved from Religious Trauma Institute

• Provides a structured approach to assessing religious trauma

3. Walsh, Diane and Koch, Gillian (2023). Helping clients navigate religious trauma. Retrieved from American Counseling Association.

This article explores practical therapeutic solutions for individuals processing religious trauma.

Readings Regarding Religious Trauma:

• You Are Your Own, Jamie Lee Finch
• Jesus Land, Julia Scheeres
• Educated, Tara Westover
• Heretic: A Memoir, Jeanna Kadlec
• Uncultured: A Memoir, Daniella Mestyanek Young
• Unfollow: A Memoir, Megan Phelps-Roper
• A Hidden Wholeness, Parker Palmer

Documentaries/Movies Regarding Religious Trauma:

• Bad Faith (Amazon, Apple, Peacock)
• The Eyes of Tammy Faye (Hulu, Apple TV, Amazon)
• Boy Erased (Netflix, Amazon, Apple TV)
• God and Country (Apple TV, Peacock)